Book Inspiration: Why I Chose Adoption for the Narrative
Becoming an author was the last thing I could have imagined when I began my journey into adulthood. My intention was always to be a child therapist. Then, with a BS in psychology, and a master’s degree in social work, I pivoted and accepted an offer to work in infant adoption.
I loved my job. I got to know the couples who’d been through so much but whose hearts remained open and eager to welcome a non-biological member to their families. It was intoxicating to be the one to call them, after way too long a wait, to let them know their baby had arrived. And it was especially gratifying to advocate for birth mothers who were too often shocked to learn they had rights.
"Becoming an author was the last thing I could have imagined when I began my journey into adulthood. My intention was always to be a child therapist. Then, with a BS in psychology, and a master’s degree in social work, I pivoted..."
Those of us working in adoption all those years ago thought we were very progressive in our viewpoints and policies. In retrospect, there was so much we didn’t know. I had some powerful discussions with adult adoptees who exposed me to more contemporary perceptions of adoption and the aim to shift focus onto the babies’ earliest biopsychosocial experience. I haven’t worked in the field for many years, yet the fight for legislation to give a voice to adoptees, to do more to educate prospective adoptive parents, and to improve the rights and support of biological mothers continues. In researching my book, it was surprising to find many adoption laws nearly unchanged from the late ‘80s; waiting to adopt is just as strenuous; and it’s still difficult to access records or connect with birth parents despite the internet’s bandwidth.
My novel is a work of fiction that relies on my personal experiences and the tremendous and lasting impact of my time in the field.
In no way am I an expert on how anyone involved in adoption or fertility treatment thinks or feels. In real life, I was an adoption consultant. My youngest client was 13 years old; the oldest was a single mother who couldn’t afford to feed another; and there were some birth fathers involved in the decisions.
Also, in real life, after I left my job, I learned I too had fertility issues. Knowing many stories of couples who’d been through the emotional and physical turbulence, I’ve always had an extra appreciation that I responded to minimal treatment and, in-between some miscarriages and high-risk pregnancies, I raised two amazing (now adult) children.
I’m often asked for advice when people hear I once worked in adoption. Too much time has passed for me to answer adequately. But I am certain of this: for adoptive couples, birth parents, and adoptees, the process still requires strength, courage, and heart.
"In real life, I was an adoption consultant. My youngest client was 13 years old; the oldest was a single mother who couldn’t afford to feed another..."
